Free Love

Sunday Service, 8 February 2026

Led by Rev. Dr. Jane Blackall

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bj-8Ws7WWX4

Musical Prelude: Ashokan Farewell (performed by Tara McCarthy, Tara Viscardi, and Jess Collins)   

Opening Words: ‘Part of Something Greater’ by Elizabeth Barish Browne 

From our very first breath, we reach out.

Co-regulation is in our nature.

We find our cues from the sun and the moon,

from each parent and caregiver,

we find our place in this great turning planet,

by turning to one another,

generation to generation.

We awaken to the dawn,

and fall asleep at the evening’s end.

Our life’s journey is part of something greater,

something simple,

something divine.

A flame cannot be lit without a spark,

a life cannot begin without the air,

and we cannot begin to find ourselves without love.

So may we reach out to one another,

may we offer love and nurturing care,

may we join together in celebration of the interdependence of our lives.

And in this spirit – the spirit of love – let us worship together this morning.

Words of Welcome and Introduction: 

These words from Elizabeth Barish Browne welcome all who have gathered this morning for our Sunday service. Welcome to those who have gathered in-person at Essex Church, to all who are joining via Zoom, and anyone tuning in at a later date via YouTube or listening to the podcast stream.  For anyone who doesn’t know me, I’m Jane Blackall, and I’m minister with Kensington Unitarians.

Our service today is titled ‘Free Love’. Every year, as Valentine’s Day approaches, I’m conscious of the wide range of responses it provokes in us. Some of us are natural romantics and we really go for all this stuff! Some of us are in the sort of coupled relationships which are in the spotlight on this annual celebration of love. Many of us are not! And some of us are a bit cynical and grumpy about the whole thing. Nonetheless, the day presents us with an invitation to reflect on love, what it means for us, how it is expressed in our lives (or how it might be, if we’re open to it).

So, this morning, I want us to explore a more expansive view of love than is typically reflected in all the traditional Valentine’s merchandise and the mainstream romantic imagery that goes along with it – which is not to say we’re going to be shy of the romantic! Eros is at the heart of things – but we’re going to think about liberating love from some of the constraints we often place on it. Love can take so many forms. It can be the catalyst for so much transformation (and disruption). And, for those of us who are so inclined, it can be a powerful way in which we might encounter God, or that which is of ultimate worth in life. So we’ve got plenty to be getting on with over the next hour…

Chalice Lighting: ‘The Spark of Love’ by Denise Cawley (adapted)

Let’s light our chalice flame now, as we do each week. It’s a moment for us to stop and take a breath, settle ourselves down, put aside any preoccupations we came in carrying. This simple ritual connects us in solidarity with Unitarians and Unitarian Universalists the world over, and reminds us of the proud and historic progressive religious tradition of which this gathering is part.

(light chalice) 

When the spark of love glows,

it melts away wrinkled brows and draws up smiles.

Love strikes us when we are seen and heard.

Love ignites in us, a glimmering joy, when we work together.

Love comes in so many forms, infinite and beautiful.

Love is not just a feeling, but a practice.

It is a way of being. For many of us, love is our religion.

Hymn 147 (purple): ‘Spirit of Earth, Root, Stone, and Tree’

Our first hymn is number 147 in your purple hymnbooks: ‘Spirit of Earth, Root, Stone and Tree’. For those joining on zoom the words will be up on screen. Feel free to stand or sit as you prefer.

Spirit of earth, root, stone and tree,

water of life, flowing in me,

keeping me stable, nourishing me,

O fill me with living energy!

Spirit of nature, healing and free,

spirit of love, expanding in me,

spirit of life, breathe deeply in me,

inspire me with living energy!

Spirit of love, softly draw near,

open my heart, lessen my fear,

sing of compassion, help me to hear,

O fill me with loving energy!

Spirit of nature, healing and free,

spirit of love, expanding in me,

spirit of life, breathe deeply in me,

inspire me with living energy!

Spirit of life, you are my song,

sing in my soul, all my life long,

gladden and guide me, keep me from wrong,

O fill me with sacred energy!

Spirit of nature, healing and free,

spirit of love, expanding in me,

spirit of life, breathe deeply in me,

inspire me with living energy!

Candles of Joy and Concern:

Each week when we gather together, we share a simple ritual of candles of joy and concern, an opportunity to light a candle and share something that is in our heart with the community. So we’ve an opportunity now, for anyone who would like to do so, to light a candle and say a few words about what it represents. We’ll go to the people in the building first, then to Zoom.

So I invite some of you here in person to come and light a candle and then if you wish to tell us who or what you light your candle for – please keep it brief – be considerate of others. I’m going to ask you to come to the lectern to speak, as we want people to be able to hear you. 

(in person candles)

And if that’s everyone in the room we’ll go over to the people on Zoom next – you might like to switch to gallery view at this stage – just unmute yourselves when you are ready and speak out – and we should be able to hear you and see you up on the big screen here in the church.

(zoom candles)

And I’m going to light one more candle, as we often do, to represent all those joys and concerns that we hold in our hearts this day, but which we don’t feel able to speak out loud. (light candle)

Time of Prayer & Reflection: based on words by Laura Horton-Ludwig

Let’s take those joys and concerns into an extended time of prayer. This prayer is based on some words by Laura Horton-Ludwig. You might want to adjust your position for comfort, close your eyes, or soften your gaze. There might be a posture that helps you feel more prayerful. Whatever works for you. Do whatever you need to do to get into the right state of body and mind for us to pray together – to be fully present here and now, in this sacred time and space – with ourselves, with each other, and with that which is both within us and beyond us. (pause)

Spirit of Life, God of All Love, in whom we live and move and have our being,

   we turn our full attention to you, the light within and without,

      as we tune in to the depths of this life, and the greater wisdom

         to which – and through which – we are all intimately connected.

      Be with us now as we allow ourselves to drop into the

         silence and stillness at the very centre of our being. (pause)

As people of faith, we seek to live in a spirit of love,

a spirit of community, justice, and peace.

And yet, in so many corners of the world both far and near,

we see exploitation and coercion, divisiveness and hate.

We strive and struggle to respond to the outer world

and our inner dramas in ways that manifest love.

At times we may fear that love will not be strong enough.

At times we may question whether love really is at the root of all things,

in this world with so much struggle and discord. So much needless suffering.

This is the mystery within which we live and die.

These are the questions that haunt our days and nights.

And yet – despite everything – we are not quite without hope.

Our struggles and our questions testify to our longing for peace, for love.

Our very longings are born out of that mystery

we dare to address as “Spirit of Life and God of All Love”.

In the stillness and silence of our own heart

we read the imprint of love: a clue, a talisman, a light within.

May it keep hope alive, even through the toughest times, even as we dwell in mystery.

May it guide us all, through our days, as we seek to act wisely and well.

May it help us to be vessels of compassion for one another and for our world. (pause)   

And let us take a few moments now to look inward, get in touch with what’s real,

what is going on beneath the surface of our lives this morning.

Let us notice what we’re carrying. What troubles us. What is bubbling up.

What questions or uncertainties we are faced with. What hopes and dreams we nurture.

And from that place of realness – silently, inwardly, ask for

what you most need – ask God, or cast it out into the Universe –

even if you’re the only one to hear your prayer – name what you need this day. (pause)

And let give thanks for what we already have. Look back on the week

and recall all those moments of kindness, comfort, pleasure, even joy.

Silently, inwardly, take the time to savour those gifts, and take in the good. (pause)

And let us turn outwards now, shifting our attention to the world around us,

starting with those dear ones closest to our heart, stretching ever outward,

and spreading all around this planet, holding all beings in the light of love. (pause)

Spirit of Life – God of all Love – as this time of prayer comes to a close, we offer up

   our joys and concerns, our hopes and fears, our beauty and brokenness,

      and we call on you for insight, healing, and renewal.

As we look forward now to the coming week,

     help us to live well each day and be our best selves;

     using our unique gifts in the service of love, justice and peace. Amen.

Hymn (on sheet): ‘What Wondrous Love’

Let’s sing again now – our second hymn is on your hymn sheet – ‘What Wondrous Love’.

What wondrous love is this, O my soul, O my soul,

what wondrous love is this, O my soul?

What wondrous love is this

that brings my heart such bliss,

and takes away the pain of my soul, of my soul,

and takes away the pain of my soul.

When I was sinking down, sinking down, sinking down,

when I was sinking down, sinking down,

when I was sinking down

beneath my sorrows ground,

friends to me gather’d round, O my soul, O my soul,

friends to me gather’d round, O my soul.

To love and to all friends I will sing, I will sing,

to love and to all friends I will sing.

To love and to all friends

who pain and sorrow mend,

with thanks unto the end I will sing, I will sing,

with thanks unto the end I will sing.

In-Person Reading: ‘In Praise of the Romantic’ by Vanessa Rush Southern (adapted) (read by David)

Despite the good that Valentine’s Day does, lifting us a bit out of the doldrums of winter, she has her critics. Some argue that the romantic ideal to which it pays homage has problems. The argument is that such starry-eyed visions of love leave lovers ill-prepared for the hard work of true, lasting love. Falling in love, or so the argument goes, is the fireworks and the flush, a trick of nature engineered to ensure that we pair off and perpetuate the species. In contrast, lasting love is a much different animal.

To last, love must be openhanded and selfless, unflaggingly devoted to the growth and fruition of another. More than a feeling, it is closer to a state of mind. It is a commitment and therefore much deeper than infatuation. Accordingly, we might indeed want to qualify our annual and seemingly perennial celebration of romantic love.

And yet, I think it would be a mistake to dismiss romantic love entirely.

The heady words of the romantic, born out of a swirl of emotion, have something worth hearing. They are full of vision and dreams. They aren’t just about infatuation or erotic love; they are witness to the fact that something extraordinary walks this world in human form, something quite divine cloaked in ordinary garb. “For thou art/as glorious to this night, being o’er my head,” says Romeo to his Juliet, “than is the winged messenger of heaven/unto the white-upturned wond’ring eyes/of mortals that fall back to gaze on him/as he bestrides the lazy puffing clouds/and sails upon the bosom of the air.”

It is an incredible thing to see the divine in the ordinary, in another human being. Moreover, it is not trickery or deceptive flush at all. In fact, it is one of the deepest truths there is. In her headlong tumble, the romantic comes to see the Divine in each of us and, as such, that we are all deserving of the wildest and most profound adoration.

Believing as she does in the grandeur and beauty of the person she has found, I wonder if the romantic is really so unprepared for the realities of love. It just may be that she is the best prepared of all.

Words for Meditation: ‘Love is Queer’ by M Jade Kaiser (adapted)

Thanks David. We’re moving into a time of meditation now. To take us into stillness we’re going to hear a poem from M Jade Kaiser of the enfleshed collective titled ‘Love is Queer’. I think they’re using queer in multiple senses at once (which is a queer thing to do!) Enfleshed is indeed a queer-as-in-LGBTQ+ collective. But at the same time I think they’re using queer to mean strange, boundary-crossing, disruptive, counter-cultural, transformative. It’s about opening ourselves up to new possibilities and allowing ourselves to colour outside the lines. That’s the sense in which ‘Love is Queer’, I reckon – it’s liable to turn our lives upside down – if we let it have its way. After the poem we’ll hold a few minutes of shared silence which will end with the sound of a bell. Then we’ll hear music for meditation. So let’s do what we need to do to get comfortable – adjust your position – put your feet flat on the floor to ground yourself – close your eyes. As ever, these words and music are just an offering, feel free to use this time to meditate in your own way.

‘Love is Queer’ by M Jade Kaiser (adapted)

Whatever else you might say about it,

Love is queer. queerer than Queer.

Which is to say, it flows more freely between and betwixt

then even our strangest surmise.

Don’t be afraid to let it unravel all your preconceptions.

It’s ok to grow aflutter at its notions of

possibilities yet explored, worlds yet revealed.

Go ahead and let it win you over (and over again)

with all the gestures of affection scattered promiscuously

throughout the land and waters, across species and friendships.

It wishes to beckon all of us away from the

tired romance of hierarchies and domination

that know so little about what it means to be alive,

why we are so unsatisfied,

or how to tend longings that span generations.

Be forewarned, however.

Like all that is queer, risk is involved.

Abandoned into such arms, you will find yourself

at odds with gods and empires.

Their wrath is not to be dismissed, but neither are we,

the queer-love and all the peculiar power

of those who find and cherish each other

materially, affectionately, relentlessly.

Period of Silence and Stillness (~3 minutes) – end with a bell  

Interlude: Wild Mountain Thyme (performed by Tara McCarthy, Tara Viscardi, and Jess Collins)  

In-Person Reading: ‘To Have without Holding’ by Marge Piercy (read by Chloë)

Learning to love differently is hard,

love with the hands wide open, love

with the doors banging on their hinges,

the cupboard unlocked, the wind

roaring and whimpering in the rooms

rustling the sheets and snapping the blinds

that thwack like rubber bands

in an open palm.

It hurts to love wide open

stretching the muscles that feel

as if they are made of wet plaster,

then of blunt knives, then

of sharp knives.

It hurts to thwart the reflexes

of grab, of clutch; to love and let

go again and again. It pesters to remember

the lover who is not in the bed,

to hold back what is owed to the work

that gutters like a candle in a cave

without air, to love consciously,

conscientiously, concretely, constructively.

I can’t do it, you say, it’s killing

me, but you thrive, you glow

on the street like a neon raspberry,

You float and sail, a helium balloon

bright bachelor’s button blue and bobbing

on the cold and hot winds of our breath,

as we make and unmake in passionate

diastole and systole the rhythm

of our unbound bonding, to have

and not to hold, to love

with minimized malice, hunger

and anger moment by moment balanced.

Reflection: ‘Free Love’ by Rev. Dr. Jane Blackall

Thanks Chloë. I feel I should issue a disclaimer before I get into my sermon – this might be a relief for some and a disappointment for others – but as I asked Sarah to warn you last week, despite the title ‘Free Love’, this sermon is not going to be as racy as you might have anticipated! I’m not talking about ‘free love’ in the euphemistic 1960s sense of sexual liberation and orgiastic revelries (though by all means go for it – in your own time! – if you’ve got the stamina and the full consent of everyone involved).

Instead, I want to start by framing our exploration of love as a profoundly religious question. We speak so much of love in the church and indeed in the wider culture. The word ‘love’ is used in so many different ways and contexts that it is imprecise and confusing. Some years ago, 9 years I think, I wrote my dissertation on the subject of ‘Models of God and the Meaning of Love’. I think there’s still a copy in the church library! And I opened the dissertation with a Biblical quote from the first epistle of John: ‘Beloved, let us love one another, because love is from God; everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, for God is love.’ Even if you are unfamiliar with the scripture you’re probably familiar with the notion that ‘God is Love’. 

I am not going to try and get the gist of the whole dissertation into this sermon! It’s just a stop along the way. But the key point, for me, was that love is the centre and foundation of our human search for meaning, purpose, and value in this life. And that, somehow, our symbolic religious language interweaves with our practice of love, with the two supporting and reinforcing each other. The philosopher Keith Ward has said: ‘We should not think of the word “God” as referring to any sort of being... to make such an assertion as “God is Love” is perhaps to have discerned, in our lived experience of loving and being loved by others, something worth ultimate commitment.’ By this I think he means that, often, our experience of loving and being loved is the way in which we humans first intuit that there is a transcendent dimension to life, and this dimension may be known through love, in all its forms. 

I will just share the concluding paragraph of the dissertation so you get an overview: ‘Many religious people employ religious language, and God-talk in particular, as a symbolic means of affirming and cultivating that which is most worthy of ultimate commitment in life. “God is Love”, in this sense, means that real, authentic, transforming love – in all its many and varied expressions – is of supreme worth and, as such, it offers a guiding principle for life and a glimpse of the underlying nature of reality.’ I closed with a few words from theologian Edward Vacek, who said: ‘Love is the heart of a person, the font of spirit, the power leading to growth, the bond tying human beings, the world and God into cosmic unity.’

So… that’s the backdrop to this morning’s exploration. Love is, for many of us, a primary source of meaning, value, purpose, depth in this life. And, for some of us, it’s how we come to know God. One way or another, for many of us, love is our ultimate concern. If that’s the case then – this is the premise of today’s service – perhaps we’re called to love ever more freely, more generously, more exuberantly, in our short time on earth. To broaden our sense of what love might look like in practice, and the shapes that loving relationships can take, liberating them from unnecessary convention and constraint. And also to be freer in our expression of love – be more ready to name and affirm it.

What comes to mind when you think about love? Maybe, by default, we picture the sort of love that’s portrayed in pop songs, in novels, on screen. A certain sort of love story – romantic, passionate, dramatic – tends to be held up as the ideal. Or maybe the associations that come up for you are shaped more by your own experiences of love as you have known it in your own life. These real-life experiences might be more varied (and more complicated) than what is typically portrayed in mainstream culture. Though in the Better World Book Club last year we did read ‘The Other Significant Others’ which showed that significant loving relationships can take all sorts of different forms.

In previous Valentine’s services we’ve talked about all the Greek names for different varieties of love – eros, agape, philia, pragma, and all the rest – but really there are as many forms of love as there are combinations of people. We don’t have to follow the limited social scripts that our culture lays out for us. Each encounter between two souls is its own unique and precious thing – alive with possibility – if we can remain open to its unfolding. If we’re fixated on a certain image, a certain ideal, of how love has to be, we might miss the opportunities to love and be loved that are right there in front of us.

I included a quote from feminist theologian Carter Heyward on the front of today’s order of service (and in Friday’s email). I think what she says is important as it frames love in the broadest terms – it doesn’t limit love to any one particular flavour or expression – and it also doesn’t hold back in affirming love’s centrality, vitality, necessity. Heyward says: ‘Love does not just happen. Love is a choice—not simply, or necessarily, a rational choice, but rather a willingness to be present to others without pretence or guile. Love is a conversion to humanity—a willingness to participate with others in the healing of a broken world. Love is the choice to experience life as a member of the human family and a partner in the dance of life.’

The reading we heard earlier from David, by UU minister Vanessa Rush Southern, ‘In Praise of the Romantic’, actually praises both the romantic and the pragmatic. Both/and. She (rightly) lifts up the romantic vision, saying: ‘In her headlong tumble, the romantic comes to see the Divine in each of us and, as such, that we are all deserving of the wildest and most profound adoration.’ Yes! And at the same time she acknowledges that mature, lasting, love can be hard work, as it requires an ongoing devotion to the flourishing of another. All that everyday maintenance, all those small acts of connection and caring, which can be quite mundane, but which can cumulatively add up to something very meaningful. I wonder how many of you are familiar with the wonderful U.A. Fanthorpe poem, ‘Atlas’, which speaks of this, with its opening line ‘There is a kind of love called maintenance / Which stores the WD40 and knows when to use it’. 

I recently read something from therapist and author Terry Real which resonates with this pragmatic view. He says: ‘We grow up thinking love is a feeling. But real love — lasting love — is a practice. It’s not built on how you feel in any one moment. It’s built on what you choose to do. That choice often shows up in small, ordinary moments. You take a breath instead of snapping. You reach for your partner instead of retreating. You say, “That didn’t come out right. Let me try again.” These are not grand gestures. They wouldn't make for a good movie script. But they matter more than you think. Because every time you choose connection, you are building trust. Every time you stay in the room with an open heart, you are practicing intimacy. And every time you repair, even just a little, you remind each other: we can do this. That’s true intimacy.’  Words on the more pragmatic side of love from Terry Real.

The poem we heard by Marge Piercy, ‘To Have Without Holding’, which Chloë read, this paints another picture of love, one which illuminates both the profound challenge and the profoundly transformative potential of authentic love between human beings who remain free. She says ‘learning to love differently is hard’, ‘it hurts to love wide open’, ‘to love consciously, conscientiously, concretely, constructively’. The poem gestures toward an idealised image of a love in which each partner remains grounded in themselves, their own person, free and freely choosing to love another, without possessing them.    It reminds me of the sort of love that proponents of relationship anarchy talk about: where each person approaches every encounter with an open curiosity about what form this relationship might ultimately take rather than forcing it to fit a particular box. Each connection is its own thing. In relationship anarchy, you would expect to have multiple loving connections – with friends as well as lovers – rather than focusing on one to the detriment or exclusion of all others. That’s not to say that all our loving connections are, or should be, equally significant. Inevitably, we will prioritise some over others, as it takes time to do ‘maintenance’, to grow in intimacy, to know and be known, to tend to a sense of security and comfort. Love is all wrapped up with bonding and attachment. Yet it seems crucial that we never lose sight of the essential wildness of the other.  Lover and beloved must know themselves to be both deeply connected and ultimately free.

Recently, I was talking to my dear friend Chris, who knows a lot about love – mainly because she’s a wonderful big-hearted human being – but she also has the professional credentials to back it up, being an associate professor of psychology who specialises in intimate relationships. We were talking about what it means to say we love someone. She pointed me towards an article by Carsie Blanton who says this: ‘The truth about love is: it happens. A lot... We have a mythology surrounding love that says it’s a special, rare feeling, reserved for just a few people in your whole life. It says that love takes time to develop, and that the feelings you experience at the outset of a relationship are not love, but something else (“infatuation” or “a crush”)… we tend to round some feelings up to love (i.e. when you first met the person you later married) and others down to not-love (i.e. your weekend fling with a Spanish dancer). The thing is, those experiences feel remarkably similar from the inside… instead of trying to deny it, or ignore it, or call it something different in each different situation, I want to call it like I feel it… I fall in love all the time. And really, it’s no big deal. It’s actually kind of fun, once you get used to it.’ 

Blanton continues: ‘Imagine if you could say… “I love you. It’s no big deal. It doesn’t mean you’re The One… it doesn’t mean you have to love me back. It doesn’t mean we have to date, or marry, or even cuddle. It doesn’t mean we have to part ways dramatically in a flurry of tears and broken dishes. It doesn’t mean I’ll love you until I die, or that I’ll still love you next year...” Then, later, you could tackle the question of whether there’s anything to do about it. All of the aforementioned – dating, marriage, cuddling, etc. – are options, and there are an infinite number of other options [such as sailing round the world together]. These are all things you can now choose or not choose, as two conscious, adult, human beings. The important distinction is that none of them is necessarily implied just by saying the word “love”.’ Some intriguing thoughts on love from the singer-songwriter Carsie Blanton.

There are things in her article that resonate for me and things that really don’t (and I imagine our responses to this will vary wildly). I think she makes a compelling case for being free with our love, not being stingy with it, not holding back. The one thing I took umbrage with was her statement ‘I love you. It’s no big deal.’ ‘I love you’ IS a big deal! Surely! It matters! OK – I do get it, I think – she means ‘I love you’ isn’t a big deal in the sense that it doesn’t have to be rationed too much, it doesn’t have to be something we only bring out for special, heightened, occasions. And, crucially, it doesn’t have to be freighted with a whole bunch of heavy expectations about what it implies. We very probably won’t mean precisely the same thing by it every time we say it. And, like she says, every pair of people in love get to decide what (if anything) they want to do about it. But those words, ‘I love you’, they mean something. And it can feel so good to say it and to hear it. Perhaps we can take her encouragement to be freer in naming and expressing love in a wider range of connections that we are generally accustomed to.

Around the same time, I came across another article by Shankar Sapram, which takes the rather interesting angle that ‘I love you’ is a kind of mantra. He says: ‘A soul-deep “I love you” isn’t just a string of words — it’s a mantra. Not a tool. Not a trick. It’s a quiet ritual that heals, anchors, and connects. When spoken with intent, it doesn’t demand anything in return. It simply gives. It flows without expecting. That’s where its power lies.’ He writes about how the expression of love can sometimes feel transactional (and how people can hear ‘I love you’ and reflexively think ‘what do you want from me?!’). His remedy: ‘To undo that damage, make it a habit to say it — not when you want something, but when you feel nothing in particular. Say it when you’re bored. When you’re scrolling endlessly. When your mind is blank and your heart feels dull. Pick up your phone, call them, and say it — just that. “I love you.” Let it sound like a heartbeat, not a strategy. In time, it becomes a small ritual that waters your bond without you even realizing it… Be the first one [to say it]. Be the only one, if needed. Love is not a transaction. It’s a flow.’

So where does this leave us? We’re never going to exhaustively explore a subject as big as love, are we…? So expect us to return to this in the months and years to come. Perhaps we can come back to the notion that love is the centre and foundation of our lives – and our faith – maybe even that loving is the primary means by which we might know God. And so, let us free love from convention and constraint, be open to love in all its forms. In this world of so much suffering and harshness seems ever more vital to love exuberantly, extravagantly, abundantly, freely, (and imperfectly) while we still can.

I want to close with a few words which call us back to love’s sacred centrality, an excerpt from a longer piece called ‘When I Speak of Love’, by UU minister Dan Schatz.

When I speak of love,

I mean nothing more

or less

than opening to what is sacred

in all of us,

even when it is broken,

even when it is hidden,

even when it is inconvenient.

This love transforms

and illumines

my heart.

This love

shapes my living.

This love

demands

better of me,

always.

This love

brings me home

when I have lost my way.

So

when I speak of love,

please do not shake your head,

or smile in condescension.

Instead,

listen

to your soul’s own longing.

[And] together,

let us speak of love.

Amen.

Hymn (on sheet): ‘Now We Sing to Praise Love’s Blessing’

Time for one last hymn, again it’s on your hymn sheet, ‘Now We Sing to Praise Love’s Blessing’.

Now we sing to praise love’s blessing

all through our lives,

laughter, joy, surprise, confessing

all through our lives,

love that dreamed a new creation,

love that dares through incarnation,

love that offers transformation

all through our lives.

How our wounds ache for love’s healing

all through our days;

how our world needs love’s revealing

in all its ways.

Fearful hearts suspect the stranger,

hardened nations arm for danger,

love lives on, the powerful changer,

all though our days.

Love’s the grace that makes us caring

all through our lives,

urges us to warmth and sharing

all through our lives,

speaks in us, oppression naming,

strives in us. injustice shaming,

lives in us, true peace proclaiming

all through our lives.

Love’s the clown that mocks at winning

all through the world,

midwife of each new beginning

all through the world,

in the struggles that confound us,

in the chaos all around us

love’s wide arms with hope surround us

all through the world.

In God’s faithful love we flourish

all through our lives;

known and loved, each other nourish

all through our lives;

though the world’s demands are pressing,

what life brings is left to guessing,

still we sing to praise love’s blessing

all through our lives.

Announcements:

Thanks to Ramona for hosting and Charlotte for co-hosting. Thanks to Tara, Tara and Jess for lovely music, to George for accompanying our singing, and Benjie for his support. Thanks to David and Chloë for reading. Thanks to John for greeting and Pat and Anna for making coffee. If you are in-person do stay for cake (it’s Victoria Sponge or Pear and Ginger cake this week).  If you’re online stay for a chat with Charlotte if you can.

At 12.30 here in the church Hannah will be offering her yoga class. If you haven’t done that before please have a word with Hannah as she has a form for first-timers to fill in.

Tonight and Friday at 7pm we’ve got our ‘Heart and Soul’ online contemplative spiritual gathering – this week it’s on the theme of ‘Tenderness’ – email Jane if you want to join.

Looking further ahead we have the Better World Book Club on 22nd when we’re reading ‘What We Don’t Talk About When We Talk About Fat’ by Fat Liberation activist Aubrey Gordon – I think all our loan copies have gone but if you want to come and you wouldn’t otherwise be able to get hold of a copy we can help you out with that – do let me know if you’re joining us.  

And looking even further ahead there are a couple of events in March to add to your diary. Having failed to get to Rainham Marshes RSPB this week we’re going to have another try for a spring walk on 12^th March. Let me know if you plan to join us. And we’re going to have another labyrinth mini-retreat to mark the spring equinox after the service on Sunday 22^nd March.

Next Sunday we’ll be back here at 11am when our service, looking ahead to the season of Lent,  will be on ‘Temptation’. After that we’ll have our Crafternoon – feel free to bring your own crafts, or we can get the colouring pages out, or a few of us will be doing feltmaking – that’s from 1-3pm.

Details of all our various activities are printed on the back of the order of service, for you to take away, and also in the Friday email.  The congregation very much has a life beyond Sunday mornings; we encourage you to keep in touch, look out for each other, and do what you can to nurture supportive connections. Just time for our closing words and closing music now.  

Benediction: ‘Love Is the Centre and Foundation’ by Shari Woodbury (adapted)

We ground ourselves in our highest values.

Love is the centre and foundation of this faith.

Love is the power that holds us together as a community.

So let us open our hearts, perpetually,

to the healing power of liberated – liberating – Love.

Love is not only something we receive,

but something we practice in community,

So let fall away all that might distract us from

the whole-hearted spiritual discipline of Love.

And as we move out into the world once again,

may we continue to listen and learn, to act and grow,

and may each of us unfold in wholeness —

both deeply loving and truly loved.

And may it be so for the greater good of all. Amen.

Closing Music: Love at the Endings, Lucky in Lovem, reels (performed by Tara McCarthy, Tara Viscardi, and Jess Collins)  

Rev. Dr. Jane Blackall

8th February 2026